Goal Setting Part 5: SHARING is caring

a few last things about goal setting and then i’ll stop. i promise.

1. write your goals down. seriously- if it isn’t written down it isn’t a goal. the writing process takes those nebulous thoughts that float around in your head, those desires and dreams for your future, and makes them real. and attainable, if you’re willing to accept the challenge and change and opportunity they bring. writing the goal down is like an invitation for it to manifest in your life and sometimes it’s the hardest part. so remember- it can only get easier once it’s written down.

2. sharing is caring. share your goals with relevant people. they will help you, they will encourage you, and they will be inspired by you. and it’s really cool to get feedback from people, and exciting to be able to share the little steps along the way. really, don’t be shy. one christmas my entire family sat down and did goals at the dining room table and that’s when we decided to hike kilimanjaro together. which we haven’t yet. but for those few hours we were together as a family, affirming each other’s ideas and dreams, which in the end was more important.

2. don’t get discouraged. as you know i’ve been doing goal setting for years. i write them down and print them and post them on my pin board at work. a few years ago i was really frustrated with my job and with the reviews i was getting and resolved to increase my overall annual evaluation score from 2.8 on a scale of 1-5 to 1.4, if 1 is the highest and 5 is the lowest. because, to me 2.8 is a 3, which is just average, and i know i’m better than average.

my boss was visiting and he noticed my goals and he read them. we discussed the new goals/task lists for the coming year and i told him about my goal to achieve an overall score of 1.4 on my next annual evaluation. he said that he had read that and thought it amusing since he was the assessor and he was the one that decided my score, not me. at that instant in time the following things crystalized for me:

  • my boss was an asshole. i lost a lot of respect for him in that moment- he had the opportunity to mentor me, and to encourage and inspire me and he failed.
  • most importantly i realized: if i write a goal, i OWN the goal. it’s MY goal. i have the power to achieve it and i will own it like a BOSS! if anything i wanted that 1.4 even more now just out of spite. NB: motivation can come from unlikely places.
  • i was inspired by a new goal: to ensure this guy was not my boss in nearest possible future. which i achieved by using this, and a few other examples, to illustrate the toxic nature of the working relationship.

so don’t be discouraged by the occasional speed bump, or asshole, that gets between you and what you want to achieve for yourself. remember this is about you and your path as you define it. forgive yourself and don’t get caught up in the little things, stay focused on those big things and don’t forget to grow.

i will not post anymore blogs on goal setting until 25 December, 2012.

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